I spent an extra two hours last week rewriting an email. Making it sound more “executive and professional.” Whatever that means.
Then I had three conversations. Three different people. Same fear underneath.
“What will people think of me?”
I deleted most of my rewrites and sent that version. Because I’m tired of the loop.
Since today is Groundhog Day and I can’t pass up a holiday-movie metaphor, let’s talk about the story for a second. I love the movie! It’s the one where Bill Murray plays a cynical weatherman who gets stuck reliving the same day over and over in a small Pennsylvania town; Punxsutawney Phil and all. (Andie MacDowell is there too, being impossibly patient while he figures his life out.)
Here’s what I notice every time I watch it: Bill spends most of the film trying on masks. Charming guy. Sensitive guy. Grand gesture guy. He’s constantly asking, “Which version of me will you like?” Trying to crack the code. Perform his way into being loved.
And it never works. He stays stuck. Same day. Same loop. Same emptiness.
The loop finally breaks when he stops performing and starts becoming. He learns piano because it fills him up. He helps people because it aligns with who he wants to be. Not for applause. Not for the outcome. For himself.
Here’s the thing they don’t show you in the movie: It’s not a one-time breakthrough. It’s a practice. For Bill? That practice was 12,395 days. A choice he made again and again.
Last week? I caught myself mid-loop. Deleted the “executive” version. Sent the real one. This morning? I’ve already “looped” and worried and now? I’ll just push send.
And those three people I talked with? I recognized their fear immediately because I’d just spent an hour doing the exact same thing. We’re all in this loop together.
That’s the personal branding journey too. It’s not about finding the right mask. It’s about catching yourself reaching for one and choosing differently. Over and over – and over. Until it becomes a little more natural each time.
That’s what we work on at SWAY | LIVE each August, not finding the perfect version of yourself to present, but building the muscle to recognize when you’re performing and choose to become more you, instead.
And, that’s the power beneath a meaningful personal brand; purpose driven, authentic, mistake making, imperfect, and a tiny grease spot on your jacket. We all crave humanity.
So, to the three people I talked with last week, and to anyone else stuck in the “what will they think of me?” loop: You don’t need a better performance. You need permission to be yourself.
Consider this your permission slip. 💜
Be unforgettable,
~ Sheri
PS: And, consider this your invitation to SWAY | LIVE BOULDER!
1) Why do I worry so much about what people think of me?
Because approval feels like safety. Many high performers default to “editing” themselves to avoid judgment—even when it costs clarity and confidence.
2) What does it mean to stop performing and start becoming?
It means choosing actions that align with who you are (and who you want to be), not what you think will get the best reaction. Authenticity becomes a repeatable practice.
3) How does this connect to personal branding?
Personal branding isn’t finding a perfect persona. It’s recognizing when you’re reaching for a mask and choosing to communicate as yourself—consistently, imperfectly, and on purpose.
4) How do I break the “loop” of overthinking my emails and posts?
Use a simple rule: write it real, tighten it once, then send. If you feel yourself “performing,” return to your natural voice and your actual intent.
5) What’s one small step I can take today?
Send the honest version. The version that sounds like you. That single choice builds the muscle to show up with more ease next time.